Some Context

Considering my level of vanity, I knew it would be only a matter of time before I decided to start a blog.

The two epiphanies that precipitated this blog’s inception, however, were somewhat frightening. One was quite sudden, and the other has been mounting for quite some time. I’ll start with the sudden epiphany.

Two days ago, I awoke craving Funny Bones.  These deliciously unhealthy snack cakes are indigenous to the East Coast (where I grew up), and I haven’t enjoyed their peanut buttery, chocolaty gooiness in a number of years. This craving sparked a suspicion that I was experiencing a midlife crisis—which, from one perspective, would be a good thing, since the logical conclusion would be that I will live to be 90. Not too shabby for a guy who used to smoke a pack a day for twenty years and survived a thoracotomy (brought on by a severe case of pneumonia) one year ago. Then I reconsidered and realized that the first half of my life has gone unblogumented, so I thought I should begin blogumenting my life.

The other epiphany was borderline terrifying—and led me to name this blog as I did. You see, there are certain places in my daily life that are part of my routine. Besides the obvious places that are common to most people’s lives (home and the workplace), I spend a great deal of my time at the gym (specifically, the Colby Fitness center on the Purdue campus), at the Borders in West Lafayette, and at Panera in Wabash Landing (also in West Lafayette). I can also frequently be found grabbing a quick lunch at the HTM cafeteria in Stone Hall on the Purdue campus. As any astute observer of humankind knows, one often encounters the same people in a specific location if one visits that location at approximately the same time of day regularly. For example, when I’m at the gym at 5:30 AM on weekday mornings, on many days I will see the same people who share my freakishly early gym routine. This kind of repeated encounter is to be expected and may even, to a certain degree, provide comfort and familiarity. However, I began to notice one person in particular at every one of my usual haunts—at the gym, at the cafeteria, at Borders, at Panera—everywhere I go, I see this person. Now, I do not suspect that this person is a stalker or that he has any kind of unhealthy interest in me. I simply fear that he represents The Me I Could Be. He shares many of my habits and preferences. He certainly seems to like the same kinds of places as I do. So why am I so terrified that I might evolve into this person? Because he is hideous. If I were Dorian Gray, this guy could be my picture. He is old, he wears thick eyeglasses, he is decrepit, he has a malformed head, he is unattractive, and he is rude. He is everything I could be—if I were to let myself go and neglect the care and nurturing of my mind, body, and soul. So I have resolved to do everything in my power to assure that Decrepit Old Rude Guy does not represent The Me I Could Be. I have constructed an image in my mind of The Me I Could Be—indeed, The Me I WANT To Be. And writing this blog is part of that vision.

Am I overreacting? Perhaps. I do have a bit of the drama queen in me. But I’m not taking any chances.